We want to be acknowledged, appreciated and validated. Perfectly normal and natural psychological behaviors of being…human. Facebook, Instagram…blah blah…You all know the drill.
Why is it we crave so much attention these days? Or are we not giving others enough attention? “Hmm…Let me Google that on my tablet…my smartphone’s charging…”
One question that boggles my mind continuously…
Why do ladies post their skimpy outfits on Facebook? Can you Google that for me, since you’re on your phone anyways…doing Snapchat. Why am I looking at a perfect angle of your boobs in a bikini, while your caption is not even remotely related to your two ‘watermelons’. Might as well be corny about it, and just write “My knockers look super fabulous today!”. Don’t beat around the bush, guuuurl…get straight to the point! Own it! Let’s see how many ‘likes’ it takes, for you to feel good today. Tag along the #FreeTheNipple or #PublicBreastFeeding campaign. One big paradoxical mumbo jumbo. Don’t even get me started on the ‘bunda’, big ‘chan chan’ hype…#squats
One thing I’m most certain about, is that we don’t compliment each other enough!
We’re always ready to criticize, judge and talk someone else down. This only reflects the way you feel about yourself, honestly. I don’t have many female friends; correct me if I’m wrong, but it feels like a battlefield out there sometimes. I don’t know if it’s women in general, or just Caribbean women. Always gossiping and talking about other women and pointing out their flaws. I’d be generalizing. But it’s that group of people who need to get their act together…’You need Jezus’.
I’m laying at the beach, you know…minding my own business. I hear a group of young women talking about how the lady in the red bikini by the water doesn’t have a ‘sanka’, or how her ‘selulitis’ is oh, so hideous…
Stòòòp ku e kos ei!
Ladies, I’d be more shocked if I saw a plastic fantastic woman, flaunting her assets she clearly paid for, to look as unnatural as she does (oops, there you have it…I’m judging…but I swear, I’m doing it for science! Having to risk your health, just to live up to Barbie doll standards, is disconcerting). So you keep sipping on your apple martini, boo…and do you…Let the natural ladies flaunt their natural selves!!! Besides, if the lady in the red bikini had well shaped buttocks and baby tight skin, she’d still be criticized, because…Jealous much, pfff…
So many insecure ladies out there as is…It’s safe to say that it’s our own gender talking us down. The way we talk about one another and portray each other, is definitely not improving our self-esteem. I swear, I’ve never heard any of my male friends criticizing each other’s packages, pointing at each other’s flaws. In fact, they slap each other’s asses more often than we ladies should. And they’re straight! Lol.
It’s not easy to ‘simply ignore’ what others think…because words cut deep, even when you think you’re strong enough to handle anything. But just remember, everyone has baggage.
Which brings us to the next topic…
I’m a simple lady. I don’t dress up to draw attention. Never felt the need to. Let’s make one thing clear though…I don’t wear socks with sandals or weirdly patterned shirts that don’t go with those weirdly patterned pants…I said, ‘simple’…not boring or looney.
After have lived in Holland for a long period of time, I’ve hit a few clubs and cafes on Curaçao and Bonaire, just to experience the nightlife there, as an adolescent. I had no idea what to expect. Of course I’d be underdressed! But I wear comfortable clothes, because I’m a hardcore dancer! I’m not going to wear my best attire and platform pumps, to sweat my ass off and risk breaking my ‘smoel’ on tile floors.
The night is young…the dancefloor, empty. The dj is good! The dancefloor, empty. The music is blasting! Empty…
Salsa, bachata, merengue, reggaeton…heheee, kizomba…This is my jam! But why is the dancefloor still…empty?!?
Sooooooo, ladies…hair on fleek, nails did, new dress, fabulous heels, matching pouch…just to go STAND, look good and stare each other down at the club. A drink? “No yu, I’m wearing last month’s salary!”
Hepa, yega pega! The photographer! Bring it in guuuurls, let’s pose together, to show Facebook what hella good time we’re having, you know…standing here. But wait…there’s hope!…Is that Cache Royale I hear…Before I could even blink, the floor is swarming with couples shuffling on the dance floor. Oh, my bad…I was too quick to judge. We do dance! (Not much movement required though, otherwise my dress will creep up my butt and I’d have to keep pulling it down continuously…or not…)
I feel a weird tension in the air…Is it just me, or is everyone pms’ing up in here. (Pre-menstrual syndrome, in case you weren’t familiar with the abbreviation for ‘back off, I’m hormonal’…)
Before you know it. Shanté claws her fake nails into Fergianteley’s boozems. Oh no, exposed watermelons!
Duck! Take cover…deadly weapons, we refer to as, shoes…flying all over the place…
“Shantééé, take your ponytail…”
So, what was the fight about anyways? Please, don’t let it be over some guy, whose neck’s covered in white powder, smelling like gazillion gallons of cologne. Because no civilized man is worth this humiliation…
It better have been a battle between ‘Who’s hot and who’s not’…now that, I can substantiate.
- Stop looking for the wrong kind of attention (I’ll spare you the whole, stop objectifying women’ speech…Because if that’s the kind of attention you need, guuuurl…Vaya con Dios…)
- Start complimenting each other (more), instead of talking each other down. In case you weren’t aware, compliments could actually save lives! Besides, after getting complimented, you’ll definitely smile. Smiling burns calories!
- Know your worth and keep (self-)degrading comments to yourself. Keep the nasty talk for in the bedroom, where it’s appreciated.
- If you want to enjoy life, do so! Who cares what others think of the way you dress or dance. Just do it accordingly.
- And last but not least, why do women… always go for the hair!!! Talk it out, like civilized human beings. If you’re not of that caliber, take it outside…with the rest of the caps.
Without further ado, by all means…Please help yourself to a compliment today!